Calming Your Anxious Mind Read online

  Let go of any attachment to outcome. Don’t try to make anything happen or to change anything. Bring a sense of curiosity and exploration to your life and to this practice. What would it be like to pay attention to the breath before, after, or during various situations? Don’t judge yourself by anything, especially feelings of calm or relaxation. This is a practice of awareness and attention. Calm and ease might arise, probably will arise, but they are not the primary goal.

  Keep in Mind

  In this chapter we have introduced and practiced awareness of breathing as a method of mindfulness. By paying attention on purpose to your breath, allowing it, and allowing yourself to feel your breath in different situations, you can break the habits of reacting and instead connect with your experience in a way that brings you freedom .

  Try to think of this practice of awareness of breathing as your friend. Bring it into everything you do. You don’t need to think of it as a chore or assignment. You are already breathing. Just start to pay attention more often to what is already happening.

  Chapter 10

  Mindfulness of the Body

  When aroused, the body’s fear system, acting through the amygdala, gives your mind and body quite a jolt.

  Muscles contract, leading to feelings of tightness in the chest and throat, along with the fear of not being able to breathe. The heart begins to race. Breath becomes rapid and shallow. You sweat profusely, and tremble and shake. Sugar is released into your blood from body stores. Thinking becomes confused, slowed, or speeded up. Thoughts focus on frightening and disturbing subjects.

  When the fear reaction occurs, the experience that arises could be called the fear body. From the present-moment perspective of mindfulness, you could say, “the fear body is present now.”

  The fear body is not easy to ignore. When it is present, the mind gets more excited and exchanges more and more information with the body. Body sensations intensify. Alarming thoughts appear and become louder. Your inner life goes on emergency mode.

  The feelings of fear and anxiety seem to feed on the experience unfolding in the body and mind. The effect is like throwing gasoline on a fire. Panic and anxiety ignite. The feelings of panic and anxiety rage intensely in the body. The fear body feels more and more solid. As this happens, the proliferation of thoughts and worries fills the mind. And so it goes, on and on.

  This is the vicious cycle in which people with panic disorder often become caught. Interrupting this cycle wherein bodily sensation leads to fearful thinking, which leads to more bodily sensationis difficult but necessary in order to manage fear, anxiety, or panic.

  But you don’t have to have panic disorder to feel your fear body or to recognize when it has arrived. Whatever the cause of the fear body, your experience from the inside is felt and direct. While it is here, you are living in the fear body.

  The fear body demands attention. The fear body experience is so strong that the mind can become absorbed in reactions to the body. So the real question is how to work with something so intense and demanding as the fear body.

  The answer to that question brings us again to a paradox of mindfulness: the best results come when you let go of attachment to any desired outcome and allow yourself to experience things just as they are.

  To practice mindfulness, you must be aware of, and establish and maintain contact with, the object of mindfulness. If you want mindfulness to help you manage the alarm and discomfort of the fear body, it is crucial that you learn to recognize and maintain awareness and contact with your body just as it is in each moment.

  Doing this means allowing the experience of the body directly and accepting that experience just as it is. It is best to make this a way of approaching life in your body. Mindfulness of the body , we could call it. Inhabiting your body with awareness is another way to put it.

  How you pay attention is important. Especially when the fear body is present, or if physical pain is present, learning to relax and make space for the intense places of contraction is very helpful. With practice, you can learn to trust your ability to find the edges of contraction and pain within and to open to a larger territory of space and stillness. Over time, with experience and practice moving in these inner landscapes, you will find the confidence you need to meet the pain and contraction of the fear body, and to transform it.

  When your body is your object of mindfulness, your meditation practice becomes attention and awareness of the body in different situations—indeed, in all situations. You are there for sitting, walking, standing, and lying down. As you are able to be more present with the body experience anytime and in any position, then, when the fear body does arise, you will have developed the concentration and flexibility of attention required to manage what is unfolding.

  Increasing Your Awareness of Your Body

  Have you ever stopped to consider how rarely you pay attention to your body when the fear body, or other physical discomfort, is not present? How much of your life do you live above your nose? How much time, attention, and energy do you spend on mental activity such as thinking, planning, or remembering?

  People seem to pay little attention below the nose except when the body yells for something to eat, has to void, wants sex, feels pain, or has some other immediate desire. Even then, in the midst of satisfying the immediate craving, their attention often moves back above the nose.

  This habit of living above the nose, or out of the body, is common. In fact, people will go to considerable effort to keep their attention above the nose. Just look at any gym or health club. Have you ever noticed how many people are reading or listening to headsets while their body works out? Is their attention below the nose? Or is it in the future, the past, or a daydream?

  Of course, people tune out of the body for many reasons. The reasons vary from the fact of being overloaded with work and trying to multitask, to not understanding the benefits of presence, to a deeper discomfort and ill ease with the body. At times, there can even be a disturbing sense of alienation from the body.

  This alienation from the body requires attention and healing. In some cases, the alienation is so deep and the wounds causing it are so painful that good counseling is needed along with mindfulness. In other cases, the habits of inattention, absence, and disconnection from the body can be corrected with mindfulness practice only. In either case, teaching yourself to pay attention mindfully to your body is a great boost to the process of healing and transformation .

  In this chapter you will learn a meditation practice called the body scan. You will also learn to do walking meditation. There are other mindfulness-oriented movement disciplines, such as yoga, tai chi, and qi gong. It is beyond the scope of this book to provide detailed instruction in these other practices, but there are many excellent books and videotapes available. Yoga classes are available in many urban and suburban areas.

  Many people find that doing a mindful body practice enables them to feel their body as they have never felt it before. They are able to inhabit their bodies freshly and deeply. This leads to a positive experience of being in their bodies and with their bodies. Sadly, many people have not had such a deeply positive experience in or with their bodies since childhood, if at all.

  In the body scan, you focus kind and allowing, nonjudging and nonstriving attention on the body itself. Attention is concentrated on each part of the body as closely and in as much detail as possible. You move your attention systematically throughout the body, excluding no part or region. Your focus is supported by linking breath awareness to the sensations in each region of the body. You practice allowing yourself to feel your body deeply, from the inside , as you breathe in and out of each region.

  Paying mindful attention to the body leads to a deeper sense of connection with and awareness of the body. You have the experience of inhabiting your own body with a deeper and steadier sense of calm and relaxed attention. Your ability to focus on any part and remain present there becomes much greater. And your body itself can relax deeply. All of the
se benefits establish a strong foundation for relating to the fear body mindfully whenever it arises.

  guided meditation: body scan

  Take a position seated comfortably or lying down with pillows supporting your head and knees. Many people prefer to do the body scan lying down, and it works well as long as you remember that this is an exercise in waking up, not in falling asleep! Make sure you are warm enough. Allow enough time to do the practice slowly, at least thirty minutes, and practice going even more slowly as you become familiar with the meditation. When you are ready, let your eyes close.

  Once settled in, spend a few moments recalling the key attitudes that form the foundation for mindfulness practice. Recall especially nonstriving, nonjudging, and acceptance. They are crucial to discovering how your body is right now, in this moment.

  Let yourself feel the breath moving in and out of the body. Allow yourself to relax and feel the whole body. Feel the mass of it. Feel the points of contact and support with the chair or floor. Don’t try to change anything you feel, just let it be. You are here for the felt experience of the body, just as it is. The practice is to experience the body, not to think about the body.

  Bring attention to the toes on your left foot. Feel what you can. After a bit, try to direct your breathing in and out of the toes. Let this be a sensation you feel of the breath extending through the body to and from the toes. Don’t make it a picture in your mind. Simply relax and see how much of the unfolding sensations of the breath and the toes you can connect with. Try to allow the breath sensation flowing in and out of the toes to sharpen your focus on what you are feeling in your toes. It is as if you become more present and more sharply focused on the toe sensations by holding them in the cradle of the breath.

  If you don’t feel any sensations, just notice that. Allow yourself to feel “no feeling.” Notice if your mind makes up a story about this, and let the story go. Come back to the region of the toes.

  Allow yourself to feel changes in sensation in the region of the toes. Feel the temperature, the contact with socks or shoes or air. Sharpen your attention as much as you can. Feel sensation in as much detail as you can, toe by toe, if you can. Stay with direct experience and with the breath sensations, in and out. Allow the sensations to come and go. Allow them to release naturally.

  When you are ready to move on, take a deeper breath and release the focus on the toes. Keep attention on the breath sensation for a few breaths, then repeat steps 4, 5, and 6 focusing on the bottom of the foot. Then move to the heel, the top of the foot, and the ankle. Keep working with the breath and the body sensations this way. Continue to extend the breath awareness into and out of each region as you breathe in and out with the body sensations you discover there. Hold the sensations of each region in the cradle of the breath. The body sensations are the primary object of attention, while breathing in and out with them helps you stay connected and present.

  Move through the regions of the left leg to the hip joint the same way. Continue holding the sensations in each region—lower leg, knee, upper leg—in focus as you breathe in and out. Then release the sensations in each region, staying present with the breath and moving on to the next region. Whenever your attention wanders, be patient with yourself and gently return awareness to the region you are focusing on and to the breath sensations.

  In this way, continue to move slowly through the rest of your body. Scan the right foot and leg, the pelvis, the abdomen and lower back. Scan the chest and upper back. Go on to the shoulders. Scan the fingers, hands, and arms—first one side, then the other—and return to the shoulders. Maintain the focus on sensations and the breath as you move attention from region to region. Continue on through the neck, the head, and all the regions of the face, including the inside of the mouth and throat.

  When you have scanned all the regions of your body, allow yourself to rest with the breath and the body as they are. Let the breath sensations come in through the top of the head, as if you had a large opening there, and then wash through the entire body and exit through the toes of both feet simultaneously. Stay with this direction—in through head, through body, out through toes—as long as you like, then try reversing the direction. Breathe in through the toes, move breath through the body, and exit through the top of the head. Do this as long as you like.

  By the time you have done all of this, you may not even feel your body. Don’t worry about that. Simply allow yourself to rest in the silence and stillness that are present. Recognize the deep peace and ease that is possible in the body experience. Realize how much control and authority does lie within you.

  When you are ready to stop your practice, simply acknowledge that, take a few deeper breaths, open the eyes, and begin to move the body slowly .

  Practice the body scan daily, especially in the early days of building your mindfulness practice. You can also practice on specific regions without scanning the entire body. Try going into greater and greater detail with a particular region, moving inch by inch or millimeter by millimeter, over the face or the lower back, for example. Make it your own practice. Become comfortable and confident about connecting with your body.

  The activity of walking offers an excellent opportunity to come into the present moment. Mindful walking means walking with primary attention focused on the activity of walking itself. In this way, the sensations and experience of walking link the mind, body, and present moment, just as the breath awareness practice does. In addition, by walking mindfully, you will begin to inhabit your moving body more consciously.

  Mindful walking can be done as a formal meditation practice or informally as a way to connect to the present moment in the midst of physical activity and movement. The same principles of mindful walking can apply to mindful exercise or other moving activities.

  Guided Meditation: Mindful Walking

  Find a place where you can walk back and forth for about fifteen to twenty paces without interruption and without feeling self-conscious. Plan to go back and forth on this meditation path for the time you do this formal period of walking meditation.

  Stand at one end of your path and concentrate attention in your body. Notice the sensations that are present. Do something comfortable with your arms: either fold them in front or behind you, or let them hang loosely at your sides. Gather your attention in your feet, feeling the sensations there.

  Slowly begin to lift one foot and begin walking. It helps to walk quite slowly, especially at first. Let your attention be on the unfolding sensations in your feet and legs as you walk. Bring attention in fine detail to the lifting of the foot, the stepping forward, and the placing of the foot on the ground. Notice how the weight shifts from foot to foot as you walk. Notice how the legs feel, and what movement in the body feels like. When attention moves away, or the mind wanders, gently return it to the sensations in the feet and legs.

  Walk to the end of your path in this manner. Stop when you get there.

  Bring attention to the experience of being stopped. Listen carefully to your body. Notice when the urge to move arises again, or the intention to turn and to resume walking. Become mindful of the arising of intention—it precedes all voluntary movement in the body. When you are ready, turn around and pause. Connect with the body and the sensations in your feet. Notice how it happens that you take the first step forward, and what that feels like.

  Practice walking meditation this way at least fifteen to twenty minutes if you can. Notice whatever arises. If thoughts or sounds or anything else become very distracting, stop walking and focus attention on that. Remain mindful, noticing the distraction, then gently return focus to the feet and resume walking.

  Although you begin walking at a very slow pace, you can experiment with different speeds, up to and beyond normal walking speed as you become more practiced. If you are very upset or agitated, it is often helpful to begin walking at a faster rate and then slow down as you become more concentrated and present. When walking fast, it may be easier to focus on a single sensation,
such as the right foot pushing off or the left foot striking the ground. Let this single sensation become your object of attention, using it to anchor attention in the midst of rapid movement.

  When walking “to get somewhere,” as often as you can, practice walking mindfully. You can do this while walking at any speed. As in doing fast walking meditation, it may be helpful to focus on a single walking sensation as your anchor. Let the foot lifting or the foot striking the ground become your object of mindfulness, linking you to the present moment. Bring mindfulness into everyday activity this way. Enjoy how it can lead to a deeper connection with life. Walk mindfully in nature, in woods, or by the sea. Walk mindfully in times of urgency and hurry. Walk mindfully when you feel fear or anxiety, and discover the power you have to be present.

  Keep in Mind

  In this chapter we have looked more deeply into the intensity and demands of the fear body. The way to manage this intensity with mindfulness is to make mindfulness of the body a habit. The body scan and mindful walking are two ways to establish mindfulness of the body in daily life. As you make conscious bodily experience a daily practice, the fear body becomes just another way the body can be. By breathing and remaining mindful of the fear body, you gain freedom from its distortions and limitations on your life.